an original play

"guitar center"

act one. scene: a guitar center store on a friday night. it is busy, crowded. the sound of power chords being poorly played on a $3,000 les paul is deafening. a young man approaches the counter.

man- uh hey, can you tell me how much that guitar pedal is? i didn't see a price tag.

employee- oh, hey dude bro whats the dilly-yo fo realz? oh that pedal? that thing is pretty sweet man, thats the dimebag darrel signature edition its totally bad-ass nah mean? its 200 dollars.

man- oh, i don't think i want to spend that much, just a basic overdrive pedal. and i don't really like that guy.

employee- whoa bra-sef, you don't like dimebag? he's insane man, check it out, hes on the video we loop on that tv all day. this pedal is the truth i have it at home, its totally killer. or we have a cheaper one over here.

man- is it any good?

employee- well i have both of these at home, and this one isn't as great bro, honestly.

man- you have two pedals that do the exact same thing?

employee- totally duder, i have all of these pedals. i have distortion, overdrive, chorus, phaser, flanger, tazer, lazer, all of them. i have each one in a few different colors too and then i have this one pedal that does all that shit i just named. i own pretty much everything we sell here.

man- whatever, just give me the cheaper one.

employee- right on bra. keep your receipt out, you're gonna have to show it to the dude at the exit and walk through that rollercoaster turnstile thing.

end.